Some part of my macho self-image would like for me to say that it was by accident I ended up here. But then again, my macho self-image doesn't admit to making mistakes.

It's about 11:30 pm on Friday, June 20, 2003. I'm at Borders Books, out in Historic Saratoga, waiting in line to buy Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. There are between four and five hundred screaming children surrounding me. An excitable little boy up at the front of the line has been very loudly counting down to midnight; his watch is ten minutes fast. I'm about to lose my mind. And I'm asking myself this question: How did I get here?

I'd had no inclination to ever read a Harry Potter book. It was a children's book, which had been turned into a stupid, children's movie. I'm no child. I read serious fiction. No kid's books for me. Nor had I had any intention of ever watching the movie. Not that I'm a movie snob or anything (Ok, ok. I am a movie snob. Sue me.) But no movie is ever anywhere near as good as the book it's based on. So, when a pretty girl talked me into watching Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, I was not amused.

That lasted about five minutes.

Rowling's characters were so human, the world she'd created so intriguing, that I soon forgot I was watching a movie. I truly felt like I was at Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. As it happened, the release date for the movie version of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets was the very next day. I went. I watched. I loved it. And it occurred to me that, if the movies were so good they could make a skeptical and jaded viewer like me sit on the edge of my seat, just how good must the books be?

I do not like losing face. I hate eating crow. And I'd been fairly outspoken with my opinions of those friends of mine who read the Harry Potter books. But I just had to know what happened next. Of course, if you're going to read a book from a series, you have to start at the beginning. So, needless to say, I insisted on borrowing the first book right away.

The movie ended around midnight. I got my hands on the book around 1:00 am and read 'til morning. Then I went to my bookstore, where I found the box set with all four books.

I finished reading in a mere two days. And I wanted more.

But there was no more to be had, and so I waited, along with the rest of the world, for the fifth book to be published.

And we waited. And waited…

At last, I saw a notice on amazon.com that Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was slated to be released in late June. The months dragged, on as months tend to do, until the day FINALLY came.

I got off work at 10:00 p.m. and rode with some friends out to Saratoga, where Borders was throwing a midnight release party.

We got to the store a little after eleven. As we had pre-ordered our books, we were sorted into Houses, each of which had its own queue at the counter. We were sorted into Griffyndor, which is not only (in my humble opinion) the best house, but also had the shortest queue. As we waited for the clock to strike twelve, we watched the crowd, marveling at the lengths people would go to show how much they loved the books.

There was no shortage of children in Hogwart's uniforms, and a number of these little witches and wizards seemed to be forever underfoot—a whole troop of very young children was marching around the store, chanting, "Go, go SLYTHERIN!" I counted about five or six Harry look-alikes, complete with lightning bolt scars across their respective foreheads. Most of the outfits had clearly been made by enthusiastic youngsters, but a few looked as if they'd been stolen right off the set.

I was beginning to feel a bit out of place, dressed as I was in my muggle clothing, and having a good ten years on most of the other customers. I was about to comment to my friends on how completely old I felt, when I heard the voice of an older woman behind me.

At first, I assumed she was some lucky kid's grandmother, staying out late to get the book. But she was talking about quidditch, a game played on broomsticks that is the most popular sport in J.K. Rowling's wizarding world. Curious, I turned around.

To my surprise, I saw two women somewhere in their mid 60's, both in full witch costumes!

This blew my mind. Granted, there's just something about Harry Potter that appeals to the kid in all of us. The story is exciting, and different from anything else I've ever read. But while I knew that kids were wild about these books, and while I'd been eagerly awaited the release of Order of the Phoenix myself, I had never quite appreciated just how popular these "children's" books had become with people of all ages.

My friends and I chatted with these newfound friends right through the countdown to midnight, when the queue surged forward.

Ten minutes later, with nearly 900 pages of book in hand, I was back on the road, trying to read by the headlights of the car behind us. It didn't work very well. Once we got back to town, we cracked open our books and didn't put them down for hours. Rowling grabs the reader's attention in the first five pages, and never lets go. I read until 9:00 a.m. when, remembering I had to work later that day, I decided I'd better get some sleep.

Work was blessedly quiet that day, so I was able to read for another four hours. I finished up just before midnight, not quite 24 hours later.

I have since re-read the book twice, to catch anything I might have missed in my frenzied race through the pages. It gets better with every read. For those poor souls who have not yet purchased the book, or haven't found time to read it, I will say absolutely nothing about the plot. I will say absolutely nothing about the character that dies. But I will say this: If you own Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix and haven't yet gotten the time to read it, call in sick to work and send the children to grandma's. If you don't have a copy of your own, beg, borrow, or steal one. And then, grab some munchies and find a comfy spot.

You're not gonna be moving for a few hours.

[Author's note: Playing hookie from work to read a book is not really a very good idea, and Demensions takes no responsibility should you suddenly find yourself in the unemployment line as a result. The author would also like to state that stealing is wrong, and Demensions will take no responsibility if you are arrested for acting on the advice of an excited wordsmith. If you do get arrested for stealing Order of the Phoenix, however, I applaud your taste in literature, and I'll send you a copy of The Count of Monte Cristo.]


[Editor's Note: As one who has suffered from the New Release Flu a time or two (or maybe it was three…), I can't say much about that. However, stealers of books have their own, special circle in the lowest pits of Hell, just below the politicians. If you get caught stealing someone else's copy of Order of the Phoenix—or any other book, for that matter—I'll send you a copy of Dante's Inferno for a guidebook. And if you've not yet visited Hogwarts and experienced the magic of Potterdom, all I can say is: Come over to the Dark side, young Skywalker. You won't regret it. —Ed.]